What To Do In The Event Of A Government Shut-Down

Obviously, we are all hoping and praying that this dire, cataclysmic event does not come to pass. But if it does, here are some handy steps you can take to deal with it as appropriately as possible:

1. Remain in your homes.
2. Shut off all power, gas, and water. Remove the batteries from any electronic devices and place them in a large open tub or box set prominently in the center of your living room.
3. Box up and stow away any books you may have, or at least fasten them to their bookshelves using string, tape or other makeshift devices as available.
4. Unlock your doors, in case any of your possessions are deemed required by the government in order to resolve this impasse.
5. Identify or obtain one (1) sturdy, e.g. wooden chair per household member. Discard any cushions.
6. Move en masse to the southwest corner of your home, preferably in the basement, and arrange the chairs in a clean row directly facing and next to the south wall (no more than 2.5 feet away). Move any furniture, shelving or other obstructions away from the wall as needed.
7. Each household member should sit in his/her chair, tallest to shortest, with the tallest household member closest to the southwest corner. Infants may need to be immobilized in this position with restraints or duct tape.
8. Sit in these chairs with backs straight and eyes pointed straight ahead at a fixed point on the wall (which may be marked with a pencil or sticker of no more than 1.5 cm radius as a visual aid, if necessary) .
9. Await further instructions.

These easy-to-follow steps should help you get through the pending government shutdown with minimal disruption or mental activity. But above all, do not panic.

About these ads